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Reason women stay in abusive relationships

These women also put their children first, sacrificing their safety: “I was afraid if he wasn’t beating me he would beat his kids. and that I valued their lives quite my very own .” And, “I stayed for 20 years while I protected our youngsters, all while I used to be being abused.” Others mentioned staying to profit the children: “I wanted my son to possess a father.”

Low Self Esteem

Related was the damage to the self that's the result of degrading treatment. many ladies felt beaten down and of no value, saying: “He made me believe I used to be worthless and alone,” and, “I felt I had done something wrong and that I deserved it.”

 Early Life

The age and stage of development of mistreatment, Some evidence indicates that the younger the child was, the more likely the problem will be in the future at the start of maltreatment. Individuals turn up to endure and entertain where the pain is and feed on the pain like an addiction.

Family Deattachment

a standard tactic of manipulative partners is to separate their victims from family and friends. Sometimes this is often physical, together woman experienced: “I was trapped within the backwoods of WV, and he would use my little boy to stay me close.” Other times isolation is emotional, together the woman was told: “You can either have friends and family otherwise you can have me.”

Financial Control

Many mentioned financial limitations and these were often connected to caring for children: “I had no family, two young children, no money, and guilt because he had brain damage from a car accident.” Others were unable to stay jobs due to the abuser’s control or their injuries, et al. were used financially by their abuser: “my ex racked up thousands of debt in my name.”

Fright

The danger of bodily and emotional harm is powerful, and abusers use this to regulate and hold women trapped.4 Female sufferers of violence are far more likely than male victims to be terrorized and traumatized.5 One said: “I was scared of him…I knew he’d make leaving an unsightly drawn-out nightmare.” Attempting to go away an abuser is dangerous. One woman felt trapped due to her husband’s “threats of hunting me down and harming all my loved ones including our youngsters while I watched then killing me.”

Twisted Reasoning 

Being controlled and hurt is traumatizing, and this results in confusion, doubts, and even self-blame. Perpetrators harass and accuse victims, which wears them down and causes despair and guilt.3 for instance, women shared: “I believed I deserved it,” and, “I was ashamed, embarrassed, and blamed myself because I assumed I triggered him.” Others minimized the abuse as how to deal with it, saying: “[I stayed] because I didn’t think that emotional and financial abuse was abuse. Because words don’t leave bruises.

Anxious 

Many described a desire to assist, or love their partners with the hopes that they might change them: “I believed I could love the abuse out of him.” Others described internal values or commitments to the wedding or partner, with tweets like: “I idea I might be the strong one who would never leave him and show him loyalty. I might fix him and teach him, love.” Others had pity and put their partner’s needs above their own: “His father died, he became an alcoholic and said that God wouldn’t want me to go away him because he needed me to form him better.”

Family Tradition and Beliefs

Many posted descriptions of how past experiences with violence distorted their sense of self or healthy relationships: “I watched [my dad] beat my mom. Then I found someone a bit like dad,” or, “Because raised by animals, you partner with wolves.” Some mentioned family and nonsecular pressures: “My mother told me God would disown me if I broke my marriage.”

Although these 7 reasons for staying are common, they are doing not describe every victim and situation. Women also can be perpetrators, and there are many patterns of violence. Yet, these posts provide compelling insider’s views of the difficulties of creating decisions during a violent relationship, and this is often helpful for outsiders to know. One reason many victims hesitate to talk up is that they're scared of being judged and pressured by friends and professionals. If more people skilled victims’ stories of abuse concerned and compassionate, rather than with criticism, more victims might speak up and find the support they have to measure a life free from abuse.

Sources

https://canadianwomen.org/blog/why-women-stay-abusive-relationships/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/love-lies-and-conflict/202001/8-reasons-women-stay-in-abusive-relationships?amp=

https://erlc.com/resource-library/articles/4-reasons-why-women-stay-in-abusive-relationships/

https://www.marriage.com/advice/domestic-violence-and-abuse/why-women-stay-in-abusive-relationships/

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