Reasons why you’re bored with your relationship
Now we know the signs of a boring relationship, we need to explore why they actually happen. The reasons for your boredom could be one of these, or all of them.
If you can learn to eliminate these flaws or distractions from your life, you’d surely be able to overcome the boredom and enjoy a perfect relationship.
Use these reasons to find out why you’re bored in love. When you pinpoint the source, it’s time to decide your next move.
1. Your days are exactly the same
Your relationship is a boring routine. It’s completely predictable, and you know exactly what you’re going to do with each other every day of the week.
When love starts to get monotonous, some of us can’t help but feel stifled like we’re stuck in a locked room. We cited routine as a sign of a boring relationship, but it’s also the cause of it too. You need to mix things up a little! [
2. You’ve lost the spontaneous excitement
Do you remember the last time both of you did something exciting together? When we’re in a relationship for a long time, we start to take surprises and excitement for granted.
If you’re getting bored because the relationship doesn’t excite you anymore, do something about it. Plan a vacation, go out for dinner once a week on a random day, just do something!
3. Your relationship foundation is fragile
When two lovers fall in love, it’s always best to take your time. Falling in love too quickly can build a romance on shaky grounds, especially if the reason both of you are together is because of one or two aspects, like great sex or a rebound relationship.
Always take your time while dating someone before you fall in love or move in together. [
4. You’re looking around for better opportunities
Everywhere you look around, you see better dating potential. You like your partner a lot, but somewhere deep inside, you feel like you’ve got the short end of the stick and deserve someone better.
If you feel this way, you really have no choice but to let go because you’ll never be happy with this person you’re dating unless you feel like an equal.
Break up, go out and have fun. You may meet someone you deserve, someone who’s way better than your current partner. But keep your fingers crossed though. [
5. You’re having an emotional affair
You may be having an emotional affair with a good friend or even a colleague at work, and not even know it!
Do you find it easier to talk about your work or your personal problems with someone else but not with your partner? Unless you open up to your partner and communicate with them, you’d always feel disconnected and bored.
In this case, you’re putting more effort into the affair than your actual relationship. [
6. You’ve allowed sex to become boring
Yes, it’s true. Sex can get rather monotonous after a few years. But that doesn’t mean you can’t turn things around and bring the sizzle back to bed.
If you find it more fun to think of excuses to avoid sex than actually have it, you’re more than just bored with your love life. [
7. You’re not making special memories anymore
Special memories are everything in a relationship, just like they are in life. When you look back at your life, you remember it by the happy memories you have. The more memories you can think of, the better and more worthwhile your life will feel.
Love works the same way. If you stop creating excitement and fond memories all the time, you’ll have nothing that’ll make your love feel special and wonderful.
8. You’ve stopped communicating
Do you ever get tired of trying to explain something to your partner because it takes too long to go into all the details? This is exactly how couples lose communication in a relationship.
They’re too bored to talk about the little things because they feel like it’s unimportant. But in reality, it’s the little things that actually count. [
Planning your whole life together is the perfect way to prepare yourselves and the relationship for the future.
But every now and then, both of you need a few moments of reckless madness to keep the relationship exciting. After all, a little detour from the straight path now and then always makes things a lot more exciting.
10. Deep down, you miss being single
This is a scary place to be, and you can never get over it unless you learn to deal with it. It may just be a passing phase, but unless you learn to cope with it, the thought will pop back into your head time and again.
What would you do when you were single? Do the same things with your partner, of course, minus the flirting with the opposite sex part. You can do that when your partner isn’t around if it makes you feel better. [Confession: I want to be single again!]
11. You lack shared goals and passions
If you have no shared passions or long-term goals together, both of you will have nothing to look forward to and will definitely end up getting bored of each other.
Build castles in the air together, and learn to dream about a better life together. It’ll make both of you feel more passionate about working towards a common goal, and bring both of you closer too.
12. You’re spending too much time together
Together time is good, but too much together time can be claustrophobic.
Spend time with your own friends or by yourselves now and then. When you meet up again at the end of the day, both of you will be excited to talk about your own lives for a change. [
13. Someone else excites you
This happens all the time, so you don’t need to feel sick to your stomach assuming you’re a two-timing liar and a cheat.
But even when you ignore this new person or avoid any thoughts of cheating, the thoughts of this new exciting person who’s full of life and mystery may psychologically arm-twist you into believing that you’re in a boring relationship.
You may not want an affair, but all of a sudden your relationship could seem lifeless. [
14. You’ve become annoyed by your partner
Do you find some details about your partner’s behavior annoying, be it their clumsiness or their laziness? Learn to communicate. Even the smallest issues grow out of proportion with time.
It’s like a snowball rolling down a hill. Unless you confront it, it rolls all the way to the end, getting bigger with every roll. Besides, we’re pretty sure you’re not perfect either!
15. You’ve lost your own interests and identity
You have no special times outside of your relationship. If you give up on your own life just to spend more time with your partner, there will always come a time when you feel like you need your own life back because you don’t know who you are anymore.
Avoid that stage, and learn to give yourself and your partner a lot of me-time. Do the things you’ve always enjoyed and have a life of your own outside of your relationship too.
16. You’re dealing with stress outside of your relationship
If you or your partner are going through something stressful, perhaps in your family life, at work, with money, or health, it can easily impact the relationship. You stop making an effort to a degree and you may become so absorbed in what is going on, that you stop communicating.
Things happen in life sometimes but your partner is the person to help you through these things. Share your feelings and work out a way through together. Even if all you can do is support one another, it’s a huge help.
17. You’re dealing with past issues
If your partner cheated on you in the past, or you cheated on them, and you decided to give it another go, your relationship will not return to normal straightway – if at all.
In some cases, you may mentally check-out of the relationship without realizing it and that can lead you towards boredom and feeling stuck in a rut.
If you’ve chosen to continue in the relationship, you have to leave the past behind and work on a better future.
18. You want more than they’re willing to give
Now, this particular reason for a boring relationship is a pretty terminal one, unfortunately. If you’re sticking around out of comfort but you know that your partner isn’t willing to give you what you need in the relationship, boredom is the least of your worries.
That doesn’t mean you should expect everything your own way, but you may have something in your mind that you need and you’re not going to get.
For instance, if you want children in the future and your partner doesn’t, that’s not going to change. Your relationship will suffer if you stick around and your life will too. In that case, you have to leave to find what you want.
19. You lack a support system
One of the biggest mistakes you can make when you get into a new relationship is to give up your friends for your new partner. Some people do this without realizing it.
Over time, they start to see their friends less and less and before they know it, they’ve drifted too far apart. Everyone needs an outside support system and people to spend time with. You can’t rely on your partner for every single thing.
If you’ve lost your support system, it could be that you start to feel disillusioned in life and that affects your relationship. You’ll feel bored and a little lost. It’s time to reconnect with old friends or start making new ones
20. You’re both just lazy
Long-term relationships do become a little samey over time, but that shouldn’t be allowed to continue for long. You need to sit up, take notice, and take action.
But, if you’re both pretty lazy and you’re happy to carry on drifting in this way, at some point you’re going to look back and wish you did something about it. Give yourselves a kick out of that comfort zone – it’s possible to get too comfy, you know!
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